Sunday, February 17, 2013

Valentine Craft COMPETITION!!!!

OMG moms! This so way cute craft competition is super tight. But even though it's so way fun, I hope you all remember that it is so way important. Because a lot of moms don't come from talented hard-working families so they don't have a lot of money to spend on crafts. That's why I do these craft competitions. So you all can practice making so way cute stuff that you can actually afford.

Take a look at the entries below and be sure to vote on the top right side of this page! Voting will stay open until the end of Wednesday.

Catherine: Simple, yet complex.
Amy: Being a working mother is a very difficult task, and sadly neither of us could take the time to make a chocolate sculpture of our children, so we combined forces and opted to go for something simple (but still heartfelt!) instead. Some people have looked at this valentine we made for our children and have thought it's dreadfully disgraceful, but I look at those generic 'Hello Kitty' and 'Shrek' valentines they send and can't help but be absolutely appalled they would criticize our incredible work of art! Our valentine was specifically designed to help boost our children's self-esteem! What better way could one phrase their love for their child than by declaring "I hate you" in a handmade card?  We gave this to all our children yesterday (though dear Timmy is still a tad bit too young to read, he'll appreciate the message in his future!), and after they were done crying (tears of joy! Mother's job well done!), ran straight up to their rooms to show all of their friends over the skype! Hope it makes it to the SO WAY CUTE craft hall of fame!
Stephanie: I found this actual picture of June Snapple. Scandalous!! Omg!!
Flo: The First Eye. The Queen of Colors. And a cat.
Kenneth & Shawntelle: It represents the compassionate side of love. We used candy canes to make the heart and arrow (that are distinctly separate), as well as crushed up candy canes for the "love dust" sprinkled throughout. The lettering was created out of spicy hot siracha sauce, to represent burning love.
Sami: I kept my valentine simple but effective.  I used spicy hummus, as I am all about eating right, being fit, and looking good! Someone in this family has to keep up appearances, amiright??  Since I'm all about green living, I reused a couple birthday "cards" the kids made for me. Don't worry, I used the sub-par ones to help encourage the kids to do better, laziness and lack of skill is no excuse for the mess the 3 and 4 year old gave me on my super special all about ME day!  If they do not face disappointment and failure, how will the young ones learn? It's not the I don't love them as much as their older sister, I just do not want to admit they are related to me with that display of "artwork."  Anyway, I think this valentine conveys the true meaning of this holiday (appreciating me) while reminding all the moms out there that motherhood is no excuse to let completely give up and let yourselves go the way 98% of you have (ahem Snapple *cough*)!!  Thanks a ton, have a super awesome Valentine's Day and thanks for the chance to win, i mean participate, in this way cute super fun craft!!!
Jill: Needs no explanation.
Melissa: This valentine totally says "by the way, you're welcome" to my man. The symbolism is in the hot red pepper flake/marshmallow combo. And the staples symbolize the unity of our love.
McKayla: This is my "totes amazing" Valentine's Day card. It features extensive use of the leftover Mac and Cheese we have after my kids went on strike and refused to eat it for lunch for the 16th time in a row.
Kristin: Actually made by a five year old so don't trash him too bad.
Andie: When in doubt, use drugs.

Tuesday, February 12, 2013


What up home girls! Hahaha. I just sounded like a poor person!!!

Anywaysies, this month has been nothing but go go go at our house. Pageant season has started again for Fortify and this year Aloe is finally ready to get started too. I'VE GOT TWO OF MY BABIES IN PAGEANTS AT THE SAME TIME! I seriously don't know HOW I do it!!!

Sometimes I try to think if it's really fair that my kids take home so many awards all the time. There's not a lot of opportunity for other kids. Then I'm all like, WHATEVER!!!! My children shouldn't be punished for being skinnier and hotter and trendier than the other kids!

Worst news ever though. June Snapple was asked to be a citizen judge in next month's Molly March Pageant. Can you say irony?!?! June Snapple in a beauty pageant? What will they think of next? Grace Telly on Jeopardy?! The real tragedy about this, though, is that that means there will be another evening where June Snapple's adopted children won't get the attention they need. I would tell you also how much I disapprove of June's promiscuity in the town, which I know about because of a rumor I started, but you know me. I don't judge. I just help.

And this week I'm going to help all my mommies with hot bodies (YOU GUYS!!!) make so SO way cute Valentine crafts! I'm sending Fortify to school with a small chocolate sculpture of Fortify wearing a tiara for each kid in her class. I'm so embarrassed about the attention we get from her Valentine gifts but they are always the best in the class every single year. UGH! Enough attention on us already!!!

This craft is for the working mommies who don't have enough time to give their children the attention they deserve. I feel so totes bad for you mommies so I'm trying to help now. So here it is!

My decorative craft celebrates LOVE in a so way cute style.  The key here moms is subtlety, which is a key June Snapple couldn't find hanging right off her huge nose.   This craft underscores how LUCKY my valentine is to have ME, without just saying it directly.  You want to remind your valentine that if it weren't for YOU they'd probably be with some whore from the poor part of town.
Alls you do is get some way cute craft paper, tape, and your favorite Luv snack.  Grace Tellie's craft would probably be made out of potato chips and Crisco!!! ;/p

You know the drill! The new so way cute craft competition is under way!!! Make your own so way cute Valentine craft using items around the house and send it to me at by the end of Friday. Next week I'll post the best so way cute crafts for a new vote and induction into the SO WAY CUTE craft hall of fame!!!!!!!!!!